Well, I'm off at my exciting summer occupation of teaching kids web design at a technology camp. My job often consists in saying things like:

"I don't really care if you mash all your food in a plastic tumbler. Perhaps you enjoy having your turkey dinner in smoothie form. Fine with me. But the cafeteria lady is looking at us funny. So stop."

"Please stop poking him. He already asked you to stop poking him."

"Don't walk in the street."

"The speed limit for rolling chairs in this computer lab is 3 miles an hour."

"No, you can't put that picture on your web page. We have a strict 'no graphic evisceration' policy at this camp."

Also, while taking the kids to the computer lab for an evening activity, I managed to set off the burglar alarm. Yay me! Now I'm typing this, watching my charges rot their brains with video games, and wondering idly whether the police are going to come.

On the other hand, my new room does have a view of three cities. And, umm, I'm almost half way through Anna Karenina.

I didn't get the job at google (though going in for the interview was fun...lava lamps galore in their offices). Doubtless, this means I am destined for despair and penury, possibly with potato vodka involved.