The first couple of months I was teaching, the kids walked all over me. And I let them. They told outrageous lies, talked over my efforts to explain polynomials, complained at length about homework and tests, side tracked me on discussions of classroom procedure, and so forth. They really aren't to be blamed; they only did it 'cause they could. Now I'm more assertive, more confrontational. I've realized that an Algebra II class is not the time or the place to have a Socratic discussion about the nature of authority; instead, I bark orders and give schedules. They whine, certainly, but not nearly as much. There seems to be progress; no one flunked their last Physics test, even the most recalcitrant are turning in homework regularly, tests are taken with minimal griping. Now, however, they have a new complaint. "Miss P, why you gotta be so negative all the time? Can't you give us more positive reinforcement?"

These are the same teenagers, you realize, who I've tutored after hours and over lunch (for free), chased after to make sure that they turn in their homework and don't flunk my course, written letters of recommendation for, praised lavishly for correct answers, and made exception after exception for when it comes to late homework and missing tests.

It was at about this time that I realized that the care and education of children is a very thankless job.

I mean, just look at me. As a child, as far as I can recall, I was bratty, overly talkative, self-absorbed, and largely amoral. As an adolescent, I was less mischevious, and instead cultivated being introverted, sullen, and prone to irrational crying jags. Ooooh, and let's not forget the quasi-British accent. Wow. Why my parents didn't strangle me, I'll never know.

In any event. Why do I do this to myself? I mean, my parents, through not throttling me, at least reaped some Darwinian benefit of passing along genes. I'm not even related to the kids I teach. Is this some maternal instinct gone haywire? A life vocation to the dissemination of knowledge, no matter how ungrateful the recipients? What?