I just got back from a Catholic teacher's conference in Florida. My principal may never ask me to go to another. Here is why...

me on the plane ride there: HA! TURBULENCE! This is so fun. Aren't you having fun? Oh. Okay, never mind. Hope you feel better. Hey, anyone want to play cards? I brought Hello Kitty cards. Let's play Go Fish! Do you have any...sevens? No? You're SUPPOSED to say GO FISH! GEEZ! Ooo, look out the window. It's SWAMP! I can see SWAMP! Miles and miles of swamp! It's the Everglades, isn't it? Everyone, look at the swamp! So cool. Wow. Swamp.

me getting off the plane: OHMYGOSH, it's so humid! Y'know what I feel like? Like I'm in a reptile house. Like I'm a tropical plant. Like I'm a sponge. This moisture in the air thing is so COOL! Isn't this cool? Isn't this a great experience? This is very different. Wow. Humidity.

me in the rental car: Now we are driving through the swamp! Look, there are birds! And trees IN THE WATER! Gosh, there's a lot of water. Water water everywhere. And trees. The clouds are humungous. Egret! Greenery everywhere! Look at how green it is, guys! WHOAH, I saw an ALLIGATOR! No, really! An alligator! Are there crocodiles here, or alligators? Oh. Everyone help me look for more alligators! Wow. Alligators.

me at the conference: It's HOT, and RAINING, at the SAME TIME! This is sooo neat! I feel like I'm in the jungle. I feel like I'm an explorer! A conquistador! A native! Look, there's little frogs on the window! AAAH! So cool! FROGS! And look at these bugs! The size of these bugs! OH GOSH THERE'S A SNAKE! On the sidewalk. Snakes on the sidewalk! So different. Look at these mosquitos. Aren't they HUGE? That's so cool. Wow. Mosquitos.

me at the beach: This water is so WARM! Yay! I'm taking a bath! Whoah, look at all these shells. This sand is so white. Look, a sand dollar! OHMYGOSH, there are crabs on this beach! I'm making them scuttle! Just like in the movies! Crabs! Scuttling! Yippee! All right, now I'm floating in the ocean, floating in the ocean...oo, what's that dark shape in the water. AAAHHH! SHARK! IT'S A SHARK! AAA! Oh. That's a school of fish. Not a shark. Err, sorry, guys. OOo, school of fish. So different. Look, it's raining again! I'm swimming in the ocean while it rains, and I'm not even cold! Wow. Rain.

me on the plane ride home: Zzzzzz.

There were some neat teacher related things that I learned, too. Mostly, the conference was more inspiring than practical; there was much to do with the place of the teacher in the universe, the nobility of teaching as a vocation, and so forth. I really liked a point which John Galten made (he was the keynote speaker): if you want your students to imitate you, you must yourself be a happy and virtuous person. If you are tired, sad, and complaining on a regular basis, no student will learn from you, because no student will want to be like you. We want what makes us happy; if living the life of the mind does not seem to make a teacher happy, then no student will want to live such a life.