The other day, I was helping make dinner at John Baby's house. We were making some stuffed pasta shell thingies, so I had a mixing bowl full of chopped chicken, ricotta cheese, fresh basil, all that good stuff. I noticed that the recipe also called for an egg. Reached in fridge, grabbed egg carton, cracked egg in, and then read the side of the egg carton. Apparently, these eggs had expired sometime in May (ha! it's almost September!). Of course, wasting all that ricotta cheese was totally out of the question, so we just cooked the pasta shells, bad egg be damned.

We are still alive, and didn't even get the runs. Although I did have a fairly weird dream that night that John Baby was already married...but, as it turns out, it was all right, because he wasn't married to a person. In my dream, I was very relieved.

Went to the park with some of my younger siblings. My youngest brother decided to strike up a conversation about linguistics with a mother and her toddler playing there.

Youngest brother: "Hey, I NEVER say bad words!"

Random mother: "That's good, you shouldn't say bad words."

Youngest brother: "See! Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiii...! See! I didn't finish it! It isn't a bad word!"

Random mother: "..."

A very interesting and well thought out answer to an AskMefi question about the paucity of female philosophers.

I have a job! It mainly involves being paid in yachts. Oh, also some tech stuff, I suppose. I am now an official computer geek, and I can wear a t-shirt reading "WYSIWYG" to work and have coworkers chortle. Could life be any more sweet? I think not.

Dead silence on the part of employers for weeks...then, two job offers in one day! Isn't it always the way. I need to talk to both of them tomorrow. Perhaps the decision will be settled by each company sending out representative gladiators, who will then fight with pitchforks and nets while I watch from the stands above, drinking from an amphora of wine. Straight from the amphora.

It is a thought.

I want to take a vacation from being unemployed.

For one thing, my writing (both will to and quality of) is suffering. I am much more funny when I have a job to snark about.

JOBS...they are SNARKTASTIC!

For another, I find meeting new people an awkward experience, at best. Now, thanks to interviews, my week is filled with meeting new people! Who I need to make a good impression on! By being myself! But not too much myself, because this is not professional! I had an "informal" second interview today, and it was by far the most unnerving thing ever, because I was sitting around and chatting with people who have the power of hiring, so we aren't actually new friends, or anything, but we will still talk about each other's families and lives and hobbies, because this is an INFORMAL interview. Although we may never see each other again. It is like Internet dating. Except, if they decide not to hire you, they don't even send a "let's just be friends" email.

Unless they are KAPLAN, in which case they sent me TWO rejection letters. Through snail mail, even!

Finally, not having a job makes me feel very aimless and ill at ease. What good are weekends? Why am I having a beer at the end of the day? What excuse do I have for being surly? All the cycles of life are disrupted.

Recently, at John Baby's suggestion, we watched a movie called "M." This movie was black and white(!), in German(!!), and starred Peter Lorre as a super creepy pervert who compulsively murders young girls(!!!).

So, in short: the ideal date movie.